I can't believe I only have a week and a half left in my 1st trimester. It seems unreal, especially being that I still feel like crap. I'm starting to see a pattern though. If I do nothing but lay in bed for one day, then the next I move to the recliner and do minimal work, I'll feel great for the 3rd day. That's how this weekend went so yesterday we took a 4 hour car ride (I'll explain later) and I was fine the whole time, besides some cramping in my hips. Now today I'm exhausted and my stomach is off. I didn't take any naps yesterday between 7am and 10pm and I'm sure that's why.
Thursday and Friday were very rough nights for me. I'm feeling a little neglected, as I always do this time of year, when hunting starts. But this year it's worse. Most likely the extra hormones and feeling lonely. I hate the fact that even when B is with me, like yesterday, I can tell all he is thinking about is hunting, turkey, deer, whatever. And I can tell that he would rather be doing that than something with me and it just hurts.
He got upset with me on Saturday because he was leaving to go hunting and I was upset he was leaving again, but I wouldn't call some one to "hang out with". First off I only have one friend in town and she works all the time and we don't have many interests in common. She's more of a hippie, bike riding, guitar playing girl. Me I like my crocheting, reading, craft show type things. She actually doesn't even know I'm pregnant yet. Then there is my family, who I can only take so much of. My sister is great, but in her first semester of college and when she comes home her time is pretty much spent with her boyfriend and her home work, so unless you're going to take her to the mall for 8 hours, don't bother asking what she's doing. I also tried to explain to him that when I do go places right now I need to know that I can leave whenever I want in case I start to feel sick or overly exhausted and being that he was taking the vehicle I couldn't do that. Am I being difficult and selfish? I mean who wants to hang out with a girl who feels miserable, I know that doesn't mean that he wants to either, but does he really have that choice? He left me by myself Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday nights.
This is getting hellishly long so if you've stuck with me this long thanks so much. I'll leave our 4 hour trip to get pizza for tomorrow.
4 hours for pizza? That is insane. It is too bad we aren't close. It sounds like we have a lot in common and I was miserable my first trimester as well so I would be completely understanding of your need to cut and run whenever you felt like it. What kind of pieces do you make when you crochet? I have so little time right now that I only edge baby blankets but my highest achievement was crocheting a king size blanket for my mother. (took forever)
ReplyDeleteI am sorry he is isn't being more attentive. Maybe a whole group of us needs to get on skype or something. Then at least we could sort of hang out and support each other too.
Hey. I know we aren't the same thing as hubby attention. I have to say, my FIL is a HUNTER and I see the same look in my MIL's eyes.
ReplyDeleteHang in and I love coming back to check in on you. Can't wait for the day you feel better.