Tuesday, August 30, 2011

13 Weeks!

Are you bored yet with the weekly updates?  I am.  Ok, in reality I'm bored with just about everything right now.  Nothing seems to be really exciting me.  Well except for the thought of being able to feel baby move, that's pretty exciting.

Last night I had a great night with Lillian.  We watched part of a movie, ate dinner, and then for the first time in a long time I put down my crochet stuff and played with her while she was in the tub.  Normally she prefers to do this by herself, but last night we were having fun filling her different sized cups and dumping them and stacking them, etc.  After bath we had a little fun while we got ready for bed with tickles and kisses and then we cuddled and watched Bo.lt.  Well I think she watched more of it than I did, but oh well.  I miss my night like that with her and I hope there are many more to come in the future.

If you're interested in what's going on in my uterus this week head on over to Baby.Centerr and check it out.

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Monday, August 29, 2011

All Jumbled Up


That how the thoughts in my head are.  So as much as I hate to do it, I'm going to give you some bullet points.
 
  • We survived the all mighty Irene.  Not that I thought we wouldn't, we do live upstate, not on the coast, and the weather man was only calling for rain and wind.  Yes it was all day rain, but nothing too heavy and only a few inches maybe.  Some people blew this way out of proportion and really irritated me, but alas it's over and we all survived and I was right.
  • I have a brother whom I've never met.  I've known about him since I was very little, but until about 6 months ago we had never even been in contact.  I had always wondered what it would be like to talk to him and get to know him.  Our conversations through email and later texting and even a phone call stirred up many emotions for me.  You see my father had never met him either.  I'm not going to get into the details of that now because what really bothers me right now is that my brother is sick.  I have learned over the last few years that you can care a great deal about people whom you've never met in person.  Friday night my brother went into the hospital and was put in ICU.  It is now Monday and he has been moved out of ICU, but they still don't know what's wrong with him.  In the beginning they were pretty sure it was meningitis, now one doctor says he thinks it still is and the other doesn't.  I am a good 10-12 hours away (I don't know for sure obviously cause I've never been there), but I feel helpless and I wish there was something I could do, but I'm not even on the "Inform immediately" list because of our situation.
  • Pregnancy guilt is high.  Although I'm finally starting to feel better (I love you Prilo.sec) and I'm getting spend more time with Lillian, I find that I still have a rather short fuse when it comes to her whining.  Some times I just give up the fight cause let's face it we need to pick our battles.  But then I wonder if I'm creating a monster by letting her think that some times a fit may work so she may as well try.  The binkies for example, I created a freaking monster and I'm regretting every second of it right now.  I hate the damn things and for some reason every day when she gets in the car to leave the sitter's she asks for them.  Of course while at the sitter's, even if she's offered them, she doesn't want them.  This is currently a battle that I have just quit fighting, I can't take the screaming after a long day at the office.  Am I enabling a brat though?  Honestly???  Is she going to whine forever to get what she wants or is this just a phase?
  • My Etsy shop is draining me, financially and mentally.  Didn't know I had one? Check it out, Brandi's Boutique. I'm buying patterns for new things and then buying yarn and ribbon or whatever, but I end up having to make 2 of everything before I can post them because I have to give one away to get pictures of it.  And really what good are the pictures if you don't have an item to sell anymore?  And well my creativeness went out the window when my sleep did.  I have been creative enough to make a few single items, but by the time I get around to duplicating them, I can't remember how I made them and have to start the process all over again.  Oh how I wish I could just be home working on this stuff all day!
 
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Tuesday, August 23, 2011

12 Weeks!

I'm here, the magic 12 week mark.

Right now I'm not really so sure what is so magical about it, but I'm so glad to be here!

Stats:
Weight: +7lbs
BP: Good
Heart Beat: 162 bpm

I had my 12 week appointment yesterday and we had a bit of a scare.  ML was sure she was going to be able to find the heartbeat on the doppler, but after several minutes of trying and finding nothing that indicated baby was in there and well she sent me to the hospital for an ultrasound.  I have to say that I am very happy that she is proactive and didn't just blow it off saying "It might be too early, we'll try again next time." cause I probably would have freaked out.  Anyway, the ultrasound showed a happy, bouncing baby with a healthy heart rate and perfect size.

The video in this link shows pretty much what I saw during the ultrasound yesterday.  Unfortunately I didn't get any pictures.

Here's what's going on this week according to Baby.Center:

The most dramatic development this week: reflexes. Your baby's fingers will soon begin to open and close, his toes will curl, his eye muscles will clench, and his mouth will make sucking movements. In fact, if you prod your abdomen, your baby will squirm in response, although you won't be able to feel it. His intestines, which have grown so fast that they protrude into the umbilical cord, will start to move into his abdominal cavity about now, and his kidneys will begin excreting urine into his bladder.
Meanwhile, nerve cells are multiplying rapidly, and in your baby's brain, synapses are forming furiously. His face looks unquestionably human: His eyes have moved from the sides to the front of his head, and his ears are right where they should be. From crown to rump, your baby-to-be is just over 2 inches long  and weighs half an ounce. Or the size of...


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Friday, August 19, 2011

Bite Me!

Before getting to my originally planned post I want to give a big Congratulations to my friends David and Sunny on their new baby girl, and of course to big sister Gabby too!

Like these
This last week Lillian did something she has never done before, she bit me!  Well that's not completely true, she did bite me once while nursing, but I think my shriek in pain scarred her enough to never do it again.  Anyway when I went to pick her up at the sitter's she was using the BIG potty.  So I sat on the floor to chit chat with her while she went.  She leaned towards me to give me hug so obviously I leaned in for the hug.  Well, all of a sudden, she bit my shoulder!  My instant reaction was to pull back and smack her hiney.  You know, that quick, but firm one?  She looked at me with the widest eyes I've ever seen on her.
As if she had no idea what she did wrong. 

Now, I know she knows what she did wrong cause the sitter's son that in only 4 months older than her has a biting problem.  Lillian has been the victim of his biting several times, but not recently.  I asked why she bit me and she just looked like she was going to cry, I don't think she actually knew why and she felt horrible for doing it.  I did tell her though, "You will not be punished this time, but if you bite again, I'm going to bite you back, do you understand?"  She said "yes, I'm sorry mommy." and we moved on and she hasn't done it since.

So you see, the biting problem is not that of my child, it is of my sitter's child.  He's had a biting problem for quite some time now although we all thought it was a phase and over with.  It had probably been almost a year since the last time he bit her until the last couple of weeks where she has come home with bite marks a few times. 
Now the sitter always tells me this happens, she doesn't try to hide it and I know he is being punished because Lillian tells me he is.  "R had to go up to his room today, he bit me." and so on.  The sitter and I have discussed it a few times and we think his biting problem is due to his older brother.  His brother is 18 months older than him and likes to play rough, like boys do, including R.  But L (older brother) doesn't always realize that R still isn't as big as him and when R has enough he bites his brother cause he knows it's the only thing that will bother him.  I know the sitter tries to stop it all, the rough play, the getting to the point of biting, all of it, but you can't always do that.  I get it.

So here's my question, how do you/will you/would you handle the biting?  Any tips or tricks on deterring it?

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Thursday, August 18, 2011

A Little of This and That

The end to a miserable day:
My miserable Tuesday didn't end much better.  I was feeling ok when I got home, but I was tired and my stomach was off.  Lillian was slightly miserable too so B told us to go in the bedroom where it was cooler and watch a movie.  I certainly didn't object.  He went out to do some yard work.  In a half hours time Lilli decided she had to go to the bathroom 3 times.  While normally this would make me ecstatic because she peed, pooped and peed again on the potty, this wasn't the case.  Every time I had to get I started feeling increasingly sick.  B came in just in time.  I was laying on the bed and just couldn't move, if I did the only place I was going was to the bathroom to lose whatever may have been in my stomach.  B could tell I was miserable and helped Lilli with whatever it was she needed.  I ended up passing out around 6 or 6:30.  I remember being woke up around 7:30 for something and then again at 9.  Neither time did I have any trouble falling back asleep and didn't wake up again until my alarm went off at 4!  Apparently I really needed the sleep!

Just Another Day:
Yesterday pretty much did end up being just another day.  My appointment got canceled because my MW had to get to the hospital to deliver a baby.  While I realize at a lot of practices this wouldn't happen because there is always some one to take over their patients.  My office though only consists of my midwife and the OB she works with, and the nurses of course.  Also this rarely happens, maybe 3 times since I started going there in Sept of '08.  And they typically call to reschedule before you get to the office.  Yesterday it just so happened that she got the call just before my appt though and the girl was at 9, almost 10.  While I know some people would have thrown a fit (I've heard stories from the receptionist) I don't mind.  I remember my nurse waiting until I was at 10 to even call and then wouldn't let me do anything until the OB got there.  That was the longest most horrible pain of my life and the only time during my whole labor that I asked for something for the pain.    Not to mention the only time during my 24 hours of labor that I was even remotely rude.  I believe after the 3rd contraction I was told to not push through my words were "Where the f*ck is she, her office is only 2 F*cking blocks away!" And yes I knew she was at the office cause when I was only 8cm the hour before they told me she was there.  Alas, no appt yesterday, it was rescheduled for Monday afternoon.  I did weigh myself though and I'm still only up 5lbs, so I'm happy with that, should me based on MW scale I haven't gained anything.
Eh, I'm done for today, that's enough rambling.  Tomorrow's post is most likely going to be about biting, I bet you can't wait!

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Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Happy Anniversary

Although today is a very big day for me and bean, I will wait until tomorrow to post about that because today is my anniversary and as much as it's just going to be another day, in some ways it's a very big deal to me.

4 years ago today was one of the happiest days in my life.  In some ways I can't believe it's already been 4 years and it some ways it's seemed like a long 4 years.  The truth is though, that our marriage is still very young.

In the last 4 years we have fought about many things, but none have them have been enough for either of us to say "I can't live like this."  Well, that's not completely true, we've said those words and then found ways to make it better.


I really think the biggest problem in our relationship is actually bringing up the problems and telling the other that we are upset.  Neither of ever wants to hurt the other or make them feel as if they have done something wrong.  In a way it's good, but it can also make both of us build up lots of little things and explode.


I love this man more now than I did when I married him and I know he would do anything for me and our family.

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Tuesday, August 16, 2011

11 Weeks

And completely emotional today. I hate feeling like I'm on the verge of crying when I have nothing to cry about.  I've lost all ability to be smart and witty today and I just can't wait for my early lunch with my mom and my sister where I will get some nice yummy crispy chicken wings.

Again I'm not posting any stats.  My mood is horrible enough today, maybe I'll do it tomorrow after my appt, where I will be hearing the baby's heartbeat for the first time! (Like my optimism there?)

What's going on this week according to Baby.Gaga:
Your wee baby is now comparable in size to a plum! 
Or for you men,

11-weeks-pregnant-baby-size2
His Boys Can Swim
Pregnancy Week 11:
Fore! The next time you swing
your golf club, know your baby
is about the size of a golfball.



Your baby's favorite game right now is exploring their face and especially their mouth.
Not only does this game improve your child's newly acquired voluntary muscle coordination of their limbs, but it also starts hard-wiring their hand nerves for newly gained sensations as they're now able to experience in their hands, because their palms can now "feel"!
Extensive facial exploration also primes their facial nerves by setting the stage for a lifetime of subtle sensations from kissing to spitting!
Final interesting fetal developments for the week: their newly acquired swallow reflex, and the beginnings of a sense of smell, which when combined with their maturing taste buds, will provide your baby with their first experiences of taste and smell in the womb.
Yeah, we're also curious what wombs smell like. We'd like to think warm and homey, which just might be the smell of freshly baked cookies.

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Monday, August 15, 2011

Losing Weight?

I wish I was referring to me actually losing weight, but alas I am not. I will weigh myself and do my weekly update in the next few days.  Can you tell I really don't want to?  Not so much the weekly update, but weigh myself.

Anyway, in the last 2 weeks I've had a few people ask me if I was losing weight.  Bless these wonderful women!  Although I looked at them like they were crazy, the truth is I probably have "lost" some weight since I saw them last.  I did lose 20lbs and even if I've gained 5 of it back already I'm still probably 15lbs lighter than the last time I saw them.  It makes me feel good to know that my body doesn't look as big as it feels.

Yesterday I decided that with approaching the 2nd trimester and the impending return of some energy, I need to start getting some exercise. 

I didn't mention last week with my golfing decision is that on Wednesday I started having sciatic pain, Thursday it turned into a lower back ache and by Friday I couldn't even stand up straight to walk.  This is a problem I've had before while not pregnant so I started doing my stretches and exercises to get my back into shape again.  In the beginning it was very hard to even get in the position to do the stretches, let alone actually do them.  By yesterday afternoon though I was at least able to go do my grocery shopping without too much trouble.  I did decide last night that I need to start sleeping with my body pillow again though to help with sciatic pain and back problems.  Which seems early to me because I didn't need them until I was about 4 months with Lillian.  Oh well, at least I don't need to go buy them this time!

Anyway, as I was saying, I decided to start my day off with some yoga this morning.  It's 30 minutes and not too strenuous, but I think it's perfect for now with my back and lack of energy.  Maybe I can get back to walking in a week or so.
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Thursday, August 11, 2011

The Golf Saga Continues

Well, not really, it is over now, but it didn't end until last night. 

Not long after posting yesterday B sent me a text saying that now they had to find 2 golfers because if I wasn't golfing the other wife wasn't golfing unless she could find one of her girlfriends to golf, and she hadn't.   I felt bad and found it kind of childish.  I understand that she didn't want to be a stick in the mud if she was the only girl and possibly didn't even know the other person, but still.  So, I told B I would golf, but if I started to feel sick or if I started to get tired and dizzy I would just sit it out in the cart.  He really didn't like the thought of it because he didn't want me to be miserable and not feeling well on a golf course.

In the end they have now found 2 new golfers and all it well, but boy did it take some brain racking to get there. 


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Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Taking Chances

I'm not a big risk taker, I like having a good idea about how things are going to.  Saturday we have a golf tournament we have signed up and paid for.  We are playing in this with another couple.  When B signed us up he said he would get some one else to golf for me if I didn't think I was going to be able to.  Well apparently he only had 1 person in mind to ask.  During this past week, that friendship has fizzled.  Along with the friendship, so has my stomach.  I was doing great for a few days, but for the last couple I'm feeling sick again.  We both really want me to golf in this tournament, but we also don't want me (or anyone else) to be miserable all day.  B keeps telling me he needs to know, but really, how am I supposed to know how I'm going to be feeling in 3 days?  Do I just take the chance that I will feel ok again, or do I have him find someone else to golf and just give it up?  I'm gonna hate missing out if I feel fine, not to mention feel bad ditching the other wife, but is it worth risking having a horrible time because I feel like crap?

What would you do?



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Tuesday, August 9, 2011

10 Weeks

Or 1/4 of the way there, hopefully a more if this little one is early like their big sister!

Not much in the way of stats since I forgot to weigh myself this morning.  I have noticed I seem to be getting some energy back, but the nausea is still there and my fuse seems to be shortening.  I'm wishing more than every that there was a pill I could give B, but alas there isn't, an honestly I don't think I could live with him for a day if he felt the way I do.

I had so much I was going to write about today, but I honestly can't remember what it was right now.  I busted my butt last night.  Between 5 and 8 I managed to make dinner, do the dishes I used, bake 2+ dozen cookies (the pre-made batter kind), change the sheets on our bed, eat, and give Lillian a bath.  Then this morning I got up at 4:30, put a load of wash in the washer, folded a load, made my and Lillian's lunch stuff for the day, put dishes away, and started putting some of my stuff away. 

I wish I could say most of this was motivated by new found energy, but it is not.  It's more motivated by my frustration and anger.  I'm not going to get into it though, I feel like I'm constantly negative and complaining lately and it's really not me.


So according to Baby.Center here's what's going on this week:
Though he's barely the size of a kumquat — a little over an inch or so long, crown to bottom — and weighs less than a quarter of an ounce, your baby has now completed the most critical portion of his development. This is the beginning of the so-called fetal period, a time when the tissues and organs in his body rapidly grow and mature.
He's swallowing fluid and kicking up a storm. Vital organs — including his kidneys, intestines, brain, and liver (now making red blood cells in place of the disappearing yolk sac) — are in place and starting to function, though they'll continue to develop throughout your pregnancy.
If you could take a peek inside your womb, you'd spot minute details, like tiny nails forming on fingers and toes (no more webbing) and peach-fuzz hair beginning to grow on tender skin.
In other developments: Your baby's limbs can bend now. His hands are flexed at the wrist and meet over his heart, and his feet may be long enough to meet in front of his body. The outline of his spine is clearly visible through translucent skin, and spinal nerves are beginning to stretch out from his spinal cord. Your baby's forehead temporarily bulges with his developing brain and sits very high on his head, which measures half the length of his body. From crown to rump, he's about 1 1/4 inches long. In the coming weeks, your baby will again double in size — to nearly 3 inches.

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Monday, August 8, 2011

I Live in a What?!

I’ve been trying to live in denial for almost 2 years now and this weekend it hit me that I just need to give it up.

Hi, my name is Brandi and I live in a trailer. It’s a double wide, but a trailer none the less.

When we bought the place I loved (and still do) how spacious and open it is. But that’s beginning to be the only thing I love about it. When we moved in, we had a bunch of plans of things we were going to do. We started by painting, which was mostly done before we moved in. Lilli’s room was painted and our room was painted, the living room and our bathroom, the kitchen was primed and I really thought since B was going to be laid off all winter (we moved in Nov.) that there should be no problem getting the painting and what not finished over the winter. I really wanted to re-sheet rock everything and get rid of the stupid seams and stuff, but we didn’t have the money.

Well it’s been almost 2 years now, and it’s been 2 lay off seasons and my kitchen is still only primed, with the addition of several huge walls where the puppy managed to scrape through the sheet rock. The living room is still lacking chair rail and molding around most of it. Our bathroom needs molding, Lilli’s bathroom needs molding and a new floor, not to mention new caulking. Our bedroom still needs molding. The play room still needs a coat of chalk board paint and the molding replaced. And even Lillian’s bedroom, that was “done”, is missing 2 pieces of molding on the closet door!

I will give some credit though, B has put in a wood floor in the kitchen and dining room and generally does small tasks I ask of him at the opportune time.

This past weekend my grandfather came over to help me put a few things up and I just realized what a pain in the ass it is to do anything in a house that is purposely made to go up so quickly and easily. All I wanted was some storage in my laundry area and it took forever to find a stud to screw it too! If you want to hang anything that needs to bear some weight in specific place (you know like centered on a wall), you have to first hang a board that is mounted to at least one stud, then hang whatever off of that. Now what looks worse, an off center hook, or a random huge board with a hook on it?

We also have absolutely NO STORAGE. This makes me want to cry. I don’t even have anywhere to store my beloved Christmas decorations. I currently have then in bins, covered by blankets so you can’t see what’s in them.

If anyone has some creative storage ideas that are little cost please let me know. I HAVE to do something.

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Thursday, August 4, 2011

9 Weeks 2 Days

To my disappointment they canceled my ultrasound yesterday, but it didn't surprise me since the first two I had were only off by two days from my LMP and the growth between them was perfect. I won't have another one until the anatomy scan between 18 and 20 weeks.  Nothing too exciting about yesterday's appointment.  Mostly lost of questions about diseases I've never heard of.  Then an exam and blood drawn.  The next one should be a little more exciting.

Stats:
Weight: +5lbs, my lack of energy is really hurting me!
Next appt: Aug 17, review blood work and try to listen for a heartbeat!

The floating baby to the right is a pretty good representation of what baby looks like this week.

Here's what's going on with Bean, according to Baby.Center, this week:
Your new resident is nearly an inch long — about the size of a grape — and weighs just a fraction of an ounce. She's starting to look more and more human. Her essential body parts are accounted for, though they'll go through plenty of fine-tuning in the coming months. Other changes abound: Your baby's heart finishes dividing into four chambers, and the valves start to form — as do her tiny teeth. The embryonic "tail" is completely gone. Your baby's organs, muscles, and nerves are kicking into gear. The external sex organs are there but won't be distinguishable as male or female for another few weeks. Her eyes are fully formed, but her eyelids are fused shut and won't open until 27 weeks. She has tiny earlobes, and her mouth, nose, and nostrils are more distinct. The placenta is developed enough now to take over most of the critical job of producing hormones. Now that your baby's basic physiology is in place, she's poised for rapid weight gain.

In other news I think Lillian is getting her final baby teeth.  She started with a fever yesterday that won't go away with Tyle.nol or Mo.trin, but she is acting fairly normal besides sleeping more frequently.  She let me look in her mouth this morning though and I couldn't see any sign of teeth so who know.

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Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Who Does That???


Last night was a rough night in this mamma's house.  I was tired, stressed out and feeling like crap.  I also decided to torture myself a little by refusing to give Lillian her Binkies until it was time for her to actually go to bed.  See she's been in the habit of starting to ask for them the second we get in the car to leave the sitter's.  It kills me that even if the sitter offers them to her there, she won't take them, but at home OMG she flips out if you won't give them to her.  And frankly I'm just sick of seeing them in her mouth and I think it may be part of the reason she is having trouble with her "L"s.  Anyway, it was one fit after another last night.  Believe it or not, my rant, I mean post, today isn't even about that. 
 
What it is really about is one of B's friends.  I swear the guy has less common sense than B does!  We all know in general men have less common sense than most women.  Of course I may be slightly over reacting with these raging pregnant hormones and all, but a girl can only take so much from the guy who invited himself on our family vacation.
Last night something was up with our phones and when B's friend called he wasn't able to answer.  Maybe an hour passed and I went in to give Lillian a bath.  We weren't in there long and B comes in handing me the phone.  Now what do I need the phone for you ask, in case some one calls obviously.  B can't answer because he is outside entertaining his friend who just showed up, unannounced, even though we didn't answer the phone!  Apparently his girlfriend had to go pick up her boys and he didn't want to ride with her.  But, get this, where she had to pick them up is about a 20 minute drive from their house, our house is about a 15 minute drive in the same direction.  So basically he only had to ride with her another 5 minutes to pick them up!!! 
 
The guy just annoys the crap outta me.  He actually called at 6:30 on a Saturday morning and said "what are you doing up, you should be sleeping."  Umm if you think I should be sleeping then why the hell are you calling my house?!
 
OK, I really am done ranting, I swear!  On a good note, I have an OB appt today.  That long boring one where they ask you a million questions with words I've never heard before.
 
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Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Reunions and Anniversaries

Good thing for this blog post or I may have forgotten that my anniversary is in 2 weeks!  But, my anniversary is not the topic of this post, my Great and Uncle's 50th anniversary and the 10th anniversary of my high-school graduation (better known as a reunion) is the topic.
 
I have mixed feelings and contradicting thoughts on reunions, especially high-school reunions.  On the one hand I've always thought that if I cared to see any of the people I graduated with then I would have stayed in touch with them.  The nosey part of me (you know you have one too) wants to know if my opinion of them in high-school was right and if they turned out the way I thought they would.
 
Thanks to my sitter I do know how some of the people are doing, but we aren't "friends" per se.  I do find it strange how many of the people I graduated with are still friends though.  Am I the only one who went away to school and made new friends?  I won't lie, I do have this fear that going to the reunion is going to be like going back to high-school with all the clicks.
 
One short month after my wedding, my grandparents celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary and everyday I hope that B and I can have the kind of relationship they do after 50 years.  Now it is my great aunt and uncle's turn and while I'm not overly close to them (we only see them when my grandparents are visiting) I feel it would wrong not to go to their anniversary party.  They've always made it a point to come to all of the functions they are invited to.  Not to mention I really think that 50 years is something to be celebrated.  Some days it's hard to imagine being 50 years old, let alone being married that long!
 
My biggest dilemma is that the reunion is from 11-5, but the anniversary party is from 1-4.  Could the time conflict be any worse???  I hate to be at the reunion and heaven forbid enjoying myself and have to skip out to go to the anniversary party, but I'm not sure how long we will be stuck at the anniversary party....  Oh the decisions!
 
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Monday, August 1, 2011

Testing... Testing...1 2 3


Lots of testing going on right now!  Lillian is in another stage where she wants to test my limits and it's driving me crazy!  I can't tell you how many times this weekend I had to "Spank her mouth" for talking back to me.  Her favorite phrase is "No mom, don't tell me!" Of course she does this while pointing her finger at me. That automatically gets a light smack to the mouth.  Right or wrong, I don't know, but it's the only thing that seems to get her attention that it's bad.   Also if I say "You better ... by the time I count to 3 or ...  1..." she says "2, 3."  And I just want to scream!  So I've started letting that be her count and once she says 3 I just give whatever the punishment is. 
 
Here's a question for you.  If your child does what you told them to do just after you say 3, do you hand down the punishment, or because they did what you said do you let it go?
 
I remember being pregnant thinking "I dont' want to spank my child, it will be a last resort."  In a way it still is a last resort, I try time out, but it doesn't always register.  I guess it's just that I didn't think spanking would be so frequent.  And all parents (well decent ones anyway) say "I won't ever hit spank my child in anger."  But let's face it, if your child is doing something that requires spanking, you are already angry.
 
In happy testing news, as you can see I'm testing out some new stuff on my blog!  I've joined TopMommyBlogs.com .  Stop by and check out all the awesome blogs they have.  Please, click on one of the banners to vote for me and let them know you like me!
 
In case you didn't notice I moved my page links to under my header and I've added a new one, Lillian's Life in Pictures!  Check it out for total cuteness without the attitude!  I will also be updating Our Journey here in the new future and may be doing some revamping on my side bar.  Let me know what you think!
 
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