Thursday, April 26, 2012

How Things Should Be

How I think things should be in my home and how they are right now are totally opposite and it's really starting to wear on me.  This is part of the reason for yesterdays post.  If things were the way I think they should be, we would have time to discuss things while Lillian isn't around.
** Edit** I wrote this yesterday based on how the morning went and the night before.  Now last night B was extremely helpful, we worked together to get dishes and dinner done and he helped with bath time.  This morning he got up when I woke him, made our coffee, got Lillian ready, took stuff to the car, and helped get the girls to the car**

How Things Should Be - Mornings:
Brandi - run/workout, shower, get Delaney's and my work stuff together, dress myself and Delaney, feed/pump,
Brian - let the dogs out, make coffee, dress, get Lillian up and ready, help me take kids to the car.

How Things Are - Mornings:
Brandi - Run/work out, wake Brian, make coffee for myself (for while I get ready), shower, feed/pump (I do this at the same time), dress myself and Delaney, get my stuff and Delaney's ready to go, let the dogs out, make 2nd pot of coffee for go mugs and his thermos, wake Lillian, get her ready, take both kids to the car
Brian - watch the news, get dressed, make coffee go mugs and thermos, take bags to the car, start vehicles.

How Things Should Be - Work Hours:
Brandi - Do work for my work, maybe pay some bills
Brian - Do work for work, if he gets done early do any shopping or chores that need to be done.  Maybe start dinner, or at least have a suggestion if we need something.

How Things Are - Work Hours:
Brandi - Do work for work, pay some bills, grocery shopping/errands during some lunch hours, make any phone calls needed.
Brian - Works, if he gets done early he goes home, some times mows lawn, some times does dishes, mostly watches TV, naps, or goes somewhere with friends

How Things Should Be - Evenings:
Brandi - Pick up Delaney, Pick up Lillian, take care of pumped milk, get next days bottles ready, feed Delaney twice between 5 and 8, eat dinner, clear table, do a load of wash (just switch and fold what's in dryer), Put Delaney to bed.
Brian - Make dinner, do dishes, give Lillian a bath, put Lillian to bed (in her bed).

How Things Are - Evenings:
Brandi - Pick up the girls (takes an hour), take care of pumped milk, get bottles ready, feed Delaney twice, eat dinner clear table, watch Lillian in bath from my bedroom where I'm feeding Delaney, lay with girls while they go to sleep. Some times I have to make dinner too.
Brian - Some times he cooks, some times he cleans up the table, watches TV, has a snack, gets Lillian out of tub and put pull up on, watches more TV, goes to bed.  He will come discipline Lillian if I am unable to when she's laying down for bed.

Other Stuff:
Lillian should be sleeping in her bed and him in our bed, but she sleeps with me and he sleeps in her room.

I should not get blamed for him not having coffee to take to work because he laid in bed a half hour after I woke up him up.

He should not be upset because he's going to be leaving late, he leaves 45 minutes before he has to be to work and it only takes 10 minutes to get there!  I leave 45 minutes before I have to be there and my drive time is almost 40 minutes, plus taking the girls into their different sitters.

I should talk to him more about what he can do rather than just doing it myself to avoid an argument.

I need to remember that my run/work out in the morning is my "me time" even if it is only a half hour and not always what I want to do.

Now I need to start working on ways to change the things that are wrong.

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1 comment:

  1. YOWZA. that's a lot to take in. I'm not sure how you're holding it together. God bless you!


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